Those Strange Things

Sometimes, unknowingly they say some things, that become a laughing stiock for all of us, so lets limelight those great funny events!

1) Oops, I lost my cell!
It is in your jeans!
Oh hello! Don't go to my family in this regard.

2) I understand your problem, but on the other hand...
You have more fingers!

3) What does that innocent watch do when it feels hungry?
I think it goes back for seconds.

4) Oh please, don't just let your mind wander..
It is far too small to be let out on its own!

5) I didn't like my beard at first, then it grew on me.

6) What happens when chemists die..
They barium!

7) Sometime I get so much anger on you but when make myself chill when I think that you are so naturally funny because your life is a joke!

8) I don't want everything but at-least God can bless me with Good company, Fame & money. intelligent friends, amazing girlfriend and supportive family!

9) Hey, Age is just a number. Yeah, and jail is just a room!

10) Slap yourself if you find 85% of the contacts in your my cell are useless!

11) I feel special when mosquitoes go crazy for me.

12) Just do it. Procrastination: working tomorrow for a better today!

13) In traffic, I horn a lot and get angry on the person who is ahead of me and expect the patience of the person who is behind me!

Now Walk

Every girls wants a sweet caring loving husband. ..
But I can't be complete every girl's wish. ..sorry!

Married life is so simple, Its just like a walkin the park.!!
BUT the problems is that the Jurassic-park...Jurassic Park... Now walk!

Some Craziest Dumbest Statements

When Mr. Romeo tells Miss Juliet that she's fat!

Well, he doesnt always use the internet, but when he does, he shares recipes and inspirational quotes. he is..the most pinteresting man in the world.

Crazy the only reason some people are starving and suffering in the world is because they aren't "so blessed".

Is there any jail just for people that don't break apart kit kats before they eat them.

My friends think that I got Right woman in my life but they don't yet know that she is 'Always Right'!

2 Doors

Why does a chicken coop only have 2 doors?
Because if it had 4, it would be chicken sedan.

What's white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.

With a Broken Pencil

Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?

BECAUSE IT'S POINTLESS!

What did Zero say to number Eight?

sigh

Coolest, craziest and simplest

Whether you're sitting idle or busy in any project, you can always spare some minutes to relax your mind and soul. No, no you need not to put any special effort for doing it, because we're giving you some of the coolest, craziest and simplest jokes for this purpose. They are one or two line long so no crack them when you get a chance.

What's white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.

Have you heard about the constipated mathematician?
He had to work it out with a pencil.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "P" is silent.

Where do you find a one legged dog?
Wherever you left it.

What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.

Which is the most stupid animal living in the jungle?"
"The polar bear."

Q:What's grey?
A: A melted penguin

Why don't seagulls fly over bays?
Because then they would be bagels!

Where did Napoleon keep his armies?
In his sleevies.

How does Hitler tie his shoes?
In little nazis.

How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A-buck-an-ear

I once farted in an elevator, which was wrong on so many levels.

What's green and when you get it stuck between your teeth, you die?
A tractor.

Get a Hole

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
In case they get a hole in one!

Guide to understanding a net addiction on various days:-
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three hours of usenet.

The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent.

Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month. Others just go over them.