Math book

Babes you’re like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my problems.

School day

Basic school day..
Me: I hate all of you.
Me: Stop screaming you saw your friend yesterday.
Me: Maybe if I hit my head on my desk I'll die.

Bake cookies

OMG! I could bake cookies on you.. 'because you know, you're HOT!

SAVE TREES

Humans are the only creature in this world, who cut the trees, made paper from it and then wrote, "SAVE TREES" on it.

Sole purpose

After all, what is your host's purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi.
- P.J. O'Rourke

High Jumping

My friend Joe is so short he uses a cigarette butt for high jumping!

Take what

IRS: We’ve got what it takes to take what you have got.